Celebrate

Sometimes I feel that I am nobody. It sounds awful when said out loud or seen in writing. Don't be alarmed or worry about me. The fleeting feeling visits me at odd times. At first I dismissed it as ridiculous. Then tried to hide away form it in fear. Finally I accepted that being nobody is a question of perspective. Looking into my life from the furthest point from myself my existence becomes insignificant. I am anonymous data, statistical entity, invisible to the world. Looking from inside out, centering myself among the people who matter to me, noticing the connections reaching in many directions, I feel taking shape, having voice, making ripples. Mostly the connections - close and far, every day and virtual, strong and lasting, and also the small and short - add color to me as somebody. And when someone unexpectedly lets me know they thought about me, the warmth of gratitude fills my day.  This week two tweets and a blog post form Leigh Anne lifted me up. Her virtual touch made me feel real. Leigh Anne has a mission, the best mission one can have, to lift others, to make them feel like a somebody.

I celebrate the power (each one of us has) 
to bring a positive feeling to someone's life. 
  

A lovely surprise from Leigh Anne.

link to the post

                                             Thank you, Ruth, for inviting us to celebrate!

Celebrate: end of a school year

After eating the party food, making paper craft cards and playing outside, the kids returned to classroom, ready to flee for summer. One of the girls left the room and returned with  a package in brown paper and tied together with a purple ribbon. Unwrapping revealed a gorgeous gift - National Geographic photograph book. What makes the book especially precious is knowing that the girl had suggested it to her mom. She said she needed to buy the book for me because I like beauty and nature and photography. It is amazing that a nine-year-old had paid attention and remembered this about her teacher. The collection of pictures and short texts promises awe and peace for days to look at, to turn to whenever feeling the need for beauty. Hidden among the printed pages I found small handwritten notes from the students and parents. The students all wishing me warm, fun, happy summer and a happy time reading the book. The parents saying thank you.

"Thank you for bringing out the best in our kids. Thank you for creating an environment of enthusiasm for learning, appreciation of growing and room for making mistakes along the way."
"Thank you for being a true teacher - caring, sincere, and honest."
"Thank you for your patience, kindness, openness and all your efforts this year."
"Thank you very much. All our children became better because of you. You changed their minds and hearts. Part of you will be with them forever."

My eyes swelled with tears. It hadn't been an easy year. I had a small group of kids. Sweet kids. Kids with different emotional, social, academic needs. Sometimes the needs blocking the way to learning. We had countless talks about how our choices affect our lives and the lives around us. What words and actions support building friendly relationships. What mindset and choices help learning. For some kid these talks gave wings to soar above what they thought they were capable of, for some these talks were like a blanket to wrap around their heart to even consider trying. Academically we might not win any prizes, yet.  Our growth lies elsewhere. We all learned to accept differences, to forgive, to make mistakes, to let go, to encourage, to take risks, to celebrate.

It touched my heart to know that the parents had noticed, understood and valued my role this year. From the bottom of my heart I appreciate the parents and students who have helped me to be and grow as a teacher I dream to be. I am very happy that I am moving on with these kids and parents. We can build on what we started this year and continue learning together.

flowers from the parents

flowers from a student

end of the year questions

A year ago, when Mimm turned 10, I asked her questions.
Today she turned 11. I asked her a different set of questions. She said that last year'ss questions were better. She claimed that she had no memory of what happened this year. Climbing around on the kitchen chairs, jumping to the floor, squeezing next to me on the sofa, bouncing her finger on my tummy sure helped to refresh her memory. I think it is going to be interesting to look back at the answers next year.

Inspired by Katie Clemons

Mimm's answers

1. What are five words that describe the past year?

dance, singing, TV, friends, desserts

2. What’s something that made you smile last year?

A card my sister drew to me, melting snow in spring, swinging on a big swing, when I am thirsty and get to drink a large glass of water, when parents get home after work, when sisters come home for the weekend

3. What’s something that made you ache last year?

people stepping on my heels and not apologizing

4. What are five moments with others that you really loved last year?

when I made a cardboard house in the living room with my friend
spending a day at the Riga Zoo and Sigulda Adventure Park with the family
going to the movies with my sisters
being in the corn labyrinth with my class
taking a train to the city on my dad's birthday and eating a cake for breakfast

5. What mistake did you make last year? What did you learn?

I didn't let a photographer take pictures of me in a dance camp. I learned that when a professional photographer takes pictures I should let her take a picture of me

6. What’s a great gift you gave to someone in need last year?

Taking pasta, flour, sugar and chocolate for holiday charity

7. What do you hope to learn or accomplish in the coming year?

I wish to learn to do a full split and circle from handstand to bridge

8. What are your three wishes for the new year?

I wish to have a pet, a new kitchen and to reorganize my room


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Since Mimm was willing to answer the questions, I thought it would be fair to answer myself too.
My answers

1. What are five words that describe the past year?

Bigger picture - seeing various schools in Estonia and Holland, reading and discussing educational issues broadened my understanding of what is possible

Awesome people - lucky to meet super teachers, inspirational school leaders, thoughtful and caring young people ready to start a new school

Risk-taking - still can't believe I said yes to public speaking experiences

Growth - glad that I am still learning as a professional and growing as a person

Calm 

2. What’s something that made me smile last year?

tulips in Amsterdam,  van Gogh's museum, students learning, Mimm dancing, middle one's graduation, giraffes, peaceful marsh lakes, Mom's 70th birthday, hours of reading, photos I took,  friends and cakes, 

3. What’s something that made me ache last year?

a young woman's death, a little boy's death, a young woman's heart attack

visiting Anne Franke's museum, the hate talk on refugees issue

4. What are five moments with others that I really loved last year?

a spring day bike ride in Holland

a summer day with a family at the Riga Zoo

a summer evening concert with my hubby in an old manor house

an impromptu family photo shoot at the countryside

a fall morning including a dance performance, cafe and bookstore with my daughters

5. What mistake did I make last year? What did I learn?

Not pushing for/demanding help for a student who needed it. I think we could have supported him much more last school year. I have learned that I need to keep asking for help, there is always a solution, sometimes it just takes more time.

6. What’s a great gift I gave to someone in need last year?

I think that saying yes and spending summer days helping a group of people starting a new school was a gift both ways. Also agreeing to give a workshop to university students was my gift of time where I got a gift of energy and learning in return. 

7. What do I hope to learn or accomplish in the coming year?

I wish to become a better leader to nudge them grow and take risks, to get us working effectively together to improve teaching/learning and support all students, to create a culture of thinking and have playful, creative, productive planned and unplanned meetings, reach out beyond our school walls and country borders, at the same time staying calm, balanced and joyful.

8. What are my three wishes for the new year?

I wish: 

health, ever so precious, for everyone 

to spend rich and warm time (moments, hours, days) with the family

opportunities to learn, play and laugh

Handicraft camp: photos only

Last year's summer handicraft camp

Celebrate

I celebrate learning

One extra busy and unusual week is almost over. I have been away from home for almost a week. Someone else taught my class. My family took care of themselves. My week was a mixture of intensive learning and enjoyable tourist experiences.

In addition to PD discussions, group work and creating presentations I was lucky to visit two different schools in Amsterdam. 

One of the schools was a pre-vocational school. It is a school for students who after national testing at age of twelve are set on vocational track. In this particular school they had three options: fashion and design, business and computer science. I was gobsmacked to see that there was a classroom where 14 year olds could learn to be hair stylists. I visited a class where 15 year olds were creating their own media centers. I saw classrooms that looked traditional and I sat for a few hours in a class where the teacher was very forward thinking. He had dreams about change, support from the leadership and he had already taken action to give more ownership of learning to the students. This teacher spoke passionately about project-based learning; the importance of relationship building; the independence, freedom, choice and responsibility of learners; involving parents and the community. He is slowly inviting other teachers to experimetnt togehter with him and some are becoming his allies. He was an excellent example how one teacher can become an agent to change.

The second school was Montessori school with I-Pads. Montessori schools are known for their very hands on sensory methods. In this school all the traditonal Montessori activities were still present, but additionally they had includd modern technology. Sometimes schools with old traditions and well functioning methods may be reluctant to accept change. In this case the school had understood that rather than to fight reality of technology they can incorporate it from the start and still stay true to their values. This was a wonderful example how the school staff was working all together to discuss and decide how to proceed and how to solve problems and make sure the children got what was best for them.

Over and over during our discussions we found how important are common values, communication, collaboration, and trust in order to support the development of children. Since the onset of the course was focusing on the trends and sub trends that influnece the education systems in the changing world we kept discussing the challenges. Listing them all seemed scary but we finished with a positive note. Instead getting down by the challenges we could look at them as opportunities to problem solve and improve. 

I celebrate free time

In the past when I have been on a course in a foreign country the days have been filled to brim with the educational meetings with only little time left for seeing the city. I really appreciate that the organizers this time had included free time to explore the city. On Saturday I took an hour long boat ride on the canals, walked in old town and visited Anne Frank Museum. I don't like to say that you must go to this museum but I encourage you to not get afraid of the more than an hour long que, the experience of seeing the hiding place is worth it. Thumbs up and a big smile for the boat ride on the canals. On Wednesday I ventured to a KattenKabinet ( a cat museum) and Tassen Museum ( a bag museum.) I am not a big fan of cats nor bags but both places surprised me positively. 

On Friday afternoon after a course out of Amsterdam we rented bikes (recommended cultural experience) and ventured to a 19 kilometer trail. We drove past the fields and fields and fields of tulips, and some fields of daffodils and hyacints. Happines is riding a bike in a sunny spring weather, birds chirping, inhaling the fragrance of flowers, light breeze brushing away age, laughing together with friends in front and behind.

This morning I plan to visit Van Gogh Musem.

I loved my week but now I am ready to go home. I should get there by midnight.

Storytelling at its best

Day 22: capturing gratitude, spring poem

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Serendipity,

Precious moment,

Rejuvenating light

Illuminating

Noteworthy newborn,

Gentle early bloom.

Celebrate this week

Celebrating together with Ruth and many others.

I have been writing comments for report cards today. I have discovered this year at school that I probably do more than necessary. (And yet, it still feels as if I am not doing enough.) It's very likely I shouldn't spend so many hours on writing reports and making them so long and detailed. But no one has recently commented on how much is needed, so I go with my gut feeling and keep writing. To be honest, our school hasn't surveyed the parents for years, to find out how they feel about the reports and whether they find them informative and useful. Many of the things I write about, the parents know already because I speak to them regularly and they have seen the student work. However, if I sit down to write reports I can't write general nothing-saying short blurbs. I wish the comments to be specific, reflecting each child's attitudes, behavior, habit, skills, knowledge and growth with some advice on how to support the child with achieving her/his goals. I have discovered that writing reports is a writing genre that I have certainly become much more skillful than years ago. 

I had set a goal to get my reports finished today. I didn't achieve the goal. I still have literacy comments to write.

Nevertheless, I decided to take a break and celebrate with you. Of many things I pick just two. 

First, I celebrate that I have been writing all day without procrastinating. (I only took few snack, stretch and bathroom breaks, and checked my Twitter feed and email only once.) I will get the reports done tomorrow. My family has been most understanding, escaping home, letting me do my work. They know that I write better during a long intensive period of time rather in small chunks. 

Second, I celebrate something exciting from this week. Mimm was part of a community musical "Snow White and Seven Dwarfs." She was one of the seven dwarfs. They had six performances over two days. It was a big show with performers of different ages, many groups of dancers, full costumes and top notch light and sound technology. 

Mimm was very nervous when she was offered this role. She practiced a lot. She was marvelous on the stage. 

Acting with expression and clear voice.

The performance didn't take place just on the stage. The other spaces were in use also. Since Mimm passed us so close, my sis was able to take this pic.

The seven dwarfs after the show.

You can imagine what a fun it was to see the musical in the middle of a busy week. The end of the year to-do-lists loose their urgency when something thrilling like this shows up. So good for the soul.

I hope that you all have a chance to get what you need done and at the same time enjoy some emotionally fulfilling breaks from the busy and demanding.

Capturing Gratitude: 100 things I am grateful for...

"Write down 100 things you are grateful for (go, I dare you)" were the last lines from an email Lauren Tober from Capturing Gratitude wrote.

I love list (50 things from summer and 100 things to write about) and I like challenges (well, most of the time)

I sat down and wrote my list, big and small things that I appreciate.

1. My patient and caring husband
2. My three wonderful daughters
3. My sweet mom and dad
4. My super sister
5. Cousins
6. Friends
7. A cozy home
8. Health
9. A dream job
10. Students
11. Parents
12. Colleagues
13. Bloggers
14. Books, books, books
15. Summer house
16. Sea
17. Dry socks
18. Scarf and gloves
19. Wild berries
20. A sofa in a kitchen
21. Yoga
22. Dancing
23. Afternoon walks
24. Chestnuts and acorns
25. Discussions to nudge thinking
26. Board games
27. Daily phone calls
28. Peace
29. Invitations
30. Legos
31. Mobile phone
32. I-Pad
33. Open air concerts
34. Internet connection
35. Freedom
36. PD opportunities
37. My writing journal
38. Bed time stories
39. Positive feedback
40. Inspirational people
41. Chanterelles
42. Vegetables
43. Flowers
44. Photos
45. My camera
46. Toothbrush
47. Toilet paper
48. Inside plumbing
49. Chickpeas
50. Oatmeal porridge
51. Nuts and almonds
52. Surprising challenges
53. Light
54. Warmth
55. Snow
56. My little red teapot
57. Teacups
58. Libraries
59. Museums
60. Cafes
61. Meeting old friends
62. Illustrators
63. Pillow
64. Sweaters
65. Zumba
66. Lemons
67. Eggs
68. Chocolate
69. Snuggles
70. Long morning sleep
71. A long weekend
72. Bubble bath
73. Train rides
74. Dreams
75. Laughter
76. Theatre
77. Cinemas
78. Crisp fall mornings
79. Starry night
80. Colorful fall leaves
81. Pinterest
82. Fresh bread
83. Read aloud
84. Cookie cutters
85. Umbrella
86. Staying home on a rainy day
87. Thank you cards
88. Homemade soap
89. Sauna
90. Memories
91. A bike 
92. A vacuum cleaner
93. My Car
94. My new glasses
95. Fresh air
96. Writing
97. A washing machine
98. Twitter
99. My schoolbag
100. Lists 

This was fun. Thank you, Lauren, for the challenge. 

I am smiling. 

Where is the learning curve?

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I hope that nobody sees me, a thought races through my mind as I climb my classroom's windowsill and open it. A gust of wind lifts few math reflection sheets and they flutter to the ground.
I know I look silly, and to think of it, act silly too. I kneel and lean a bit sideways, lift my camera and zoom it to the top of a maple tree against the sky. I don't want anyone to see this. I wouldn't know how to explain why I am taking photos of a tree and sky in the middle of the fifth period, when kids are in Music and I should be sorting and putting away papers, part of which have landed on the floor.
Would they understand that I have joined a project to take photos of gratitude for a whole month? Would it make sense to them that I am sincerely grateful to see the colors of the tree and all the light of the sun? Fall can be rainy and dark in Estonia. Would they realize that I am happy because I lifted my eyes and looked above the ugliest brick wall ever that is my usual view? Maybe they would understand if I said I was learning to take photos.
I turn off the camera, close the window, climb down, pick up the papers and put my camera away. The downloading of photos has to wait.
I don't know whether these photos have captured what I saw without the camera. On Saturday my sis and I laughed that all the sea pictures I had taken would be with a slanted horizon, and they were. On every single picture the sea and the sky were tilted. I had to straighten and crop the pictures to be able to share with others.
I have found that having theoretical knowledge (I admit I have read several posts a'la how to take stunning pics) does not easily transfer to practice. I understand the idea of light, background and composition. Nevertheless, the shadows and silly details like a lonely sock, or a dirty window, laugh back once I view my pics on the laptop. I have not got very far with taking pics of people and action. I like to stick to the bit advice my sis gave to me - take close up pics and then share them big - and this has worked well so far.
One would think that compared to painting and writing taking photos is easy. All you need is a click of a button. But it is not. Like anything else it takes patience and tons of practice to have pleasing outcomes. Occasionally lovely pictures just happen.

Donalyn Miller was in my living room

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Not sure whether this was a sign of professionalism or a sign of something else but I was super excited on Saturday evening to sit in my living room, in a small village in Estonia, with a laptop and I-Pad both open and ready to join an online PD opportunity. The lovely yellow sign of The EdCollab Gathering invitingly smiled at me.

On the positive side and as a justification on my choice I can say that my hubby and youngest daughter were not at home, my oldest daughters can take care of themselves, this kind of opportunity rarely happens. Usually most webinars happen at 4 a.m, nor can I join any conferences that take place in US.

Here I was, headphones on and fingers ready to tweet. I also had some slices of fancy cheese for nibbling and a tissue to wipe my fingers.

I was ready.

The Opening Keynote

When Christopher Lehman started speaking it felt like an old friend returned. I had had a thrilling learning experience with TeacherPoets in the spring.

When Donalyn Miller started speaking I had chills going down my spine. There was no way to imagine when I was a child that as an adult I would have a famous literary mentor, author whose books I have read, smiling and speaking in my living room. The magic of technology combined with a gracious gift of talented people made it possible.

Did Donalyn know I was there? No. She doesn’t even know that I exist, nor that I suggested her books to our Middles School English teacher and she rearranged her whole program inspired by Donalyn’s words. Donalyn may have not known that I was listening to her on Saturday but I hope that she had a little electronic map where the different countries lit up to show her the international audience.

I listened to her and realized that I need to add more non-fiction books to my classroom library, from different perspectives, topics, authors, and countries. Our school is doing a pretty good job when it comes to units of inquiry. We abandoned textbooks years ago and replaced them with various resources including non-fiction books. We have grown our library, but my job would be to have more non fiction as read aloud and student choice.

I guess it goes in circles. We had a year when we added chapter books, then poetry books, then picture books, for next year I will order non fiction books. I have my list started thanks to the help of Donalyn Miller. I need to make sure that the suggestions of students will be included too, because ultimately the library is for them not me.

What I think Donalyn Miller does best is to invite the teachers to reflect on their practices, preferences and habits as a reader.

Then the gathering became tricky. I had to choose. In each session there were 4 workshops. Even with two ears and two eyes one can listen and watch only one workshop at a time. What made choosing easier was the knowledge that all workshops are accessible later.

I followed four workshops.

Renee Houser - Management Strategies to Support Critical Thinking

Kristin Ziemke - Social Media in Elementary

Molli Cura - Strategies for ELL

Kristine Mraz and  Christine Hertz - Early Childhood Classroom on Risk and Resilience

First of all I was impressed how passionate and well-organized all presenters were. It was easy to follow what they said, they kept the audience thinking along and left us with ideas for change and improvement. Of course there were moments to nod along and feel good that I am not too far off with what I do.

As I listened I realized that I am very lucky to work at a IBO PYP school. The center of everything is a learner profile, the kind of person we aspire to be and hope our students to become. We deliberately plan for learning opportunities that help the students acquire positive attitudes and learn trans-disciplinary skills. Reflection and metacognition are significant elements in the program. We have shaped our learning environment so that space, time and teachers allow student choice and encourage initiative.

At some point in my teaching I felt frustration with the planner that has become too detailed and in many ways repetitive asking for what opportunities are there for attitude or skill development, but now listening to Kristin Mraz I think that I probably have to take extra time to teach, name, explain, look for examples and comment on the behavior. The time is worth it even when it does not tie to math or language or inquiry scope and sequence. The facts may be forgotten but habits of mind and behavior are forever to have a full, successful and happy life as a friend, citizen, learner, and leader.

And while I was watching the workshops I was also tweeting and following what others tweeted.

I am not still sure I get Twitter but I am not going to give up on it. It was fascinating to see the tweets coming and ideas growing and changing. It was puzzling but powerful to feel connected with people on the other side of the world through this experience. I am only sad that I didn't have a chance to go out for a cup of tea with anyone later. On the positive side, I didn't go to a bookstore either as I had done the day before after another conference.

The whole experience with two tools open, watching and tweeting, was a bit surreal. So not like usual conferences or workshops. Nevertheless it ranks as highly useful and interesting learning experience. 

Thank you to all the wonderful presenters!

I still can't get over it: Donalyn Miller was in my living room.

Celebrate this week: Peace

Ruth Ayres invites people to share a celebration every Saturday. Thinking back to a week you can pick anything - small or big - to celebrate. Thank you for the invitation, Ruth!

On Tuesday in the comments for my SOL Bonnie asked, "BTW are you nervous about Russia talking tough?"

To be honest I have avoided thinking about Russia. Partly because I am busy thinking and living beginning of the school year life. Partly because it is easier to focus on what is in immediate surrounding. Partly because of a typical Estonian attitude that if Russia decides to attack, Estonia doesn't have a chance. The rich and the mighty might escape, the others will suffer. I don't believe in the promises of the politicians and large foreign agencies. So why worry? Instead one can continue drinking tea, eat muffins and go for walks. Life can be a berry when you let the belly button be the center of your universe. 

I changed some of my thinking and attitude when I had a chance to listen to Barack Obama.
When I received the invitation, I wasn't too excited. I understood that our director and DP coordinator and DP students were invited. But why me and no other teacher from our school?

At first I thought of not attending. Knowing that the city would be closed for traffic I worried about getting to town. Then I realized that it was a honor to be invited and overall once in a life time opportunity to listen to a leader of a mighty country. 

On Wednesday I was one of the 1500 sitting in the concert hall. There were politicians, ambassadors, soldiers, journalists, business people, culture people, school directors, and teachers. The large number of listeners were high school and university students.

I went with an interest but I wasn't ready that the speech would touch me emotionally. The president spoke about our history, picking in phrases that mattered to Estonians. He spoke about the importance of independent thinking, free press and democratic elections, of freedom and independence. He complimented Estonia for our success in free market, technological advances and innovative spirit. 

I thought about the short independence my country had before the second world war and about how short is the 20 years we have been independent again; about the importance of education in keeping the freedom and democracy; how ignorance, greed and selfishness lead to conflicts, how lack of critical thinking leads to believing and following wrong information; about Malala, a girl who got shot because she spoke up for peace and the right for girls to get education; about the different wars in various countries where most of the people would simply like to learn, work and play; how precious is peace and how easily it's threatened.

When he started speaking about the Ukraine conflict, Russia, NATO and Estonia, he made it very clear that in case of a threat Estonia wouldn't be alone. This is what most Estonians needed to hear. The way the President said it and the words he spoke gave strong hope that Russia would not be able to repeat the history. 

He spoke about the importance of hope. Here is one part that I would like to quote:

 "In the face of violence that seems intractable and suffering that is so senseless, it is easy to grow cynical, and I think tempting to give in to the notion that peace and security may be beyond our grasp. 

But I say to all of you here today, especially the young people, do not give into that cynicism.  Do not lose the idealism and optimism that is the root of all great change. Don’t ever lose the faith that says, if we want it, if we are willing to work for it, if we stand together, the future can be different; tomorrow can be better.  After all, the only reason we’re here today in a free and democratic Estonia is because the Estonian people never gave up."

He finished with instilling hope that dignity, democracy, freedom and justice will always win.

I knew that Barack Obama had prompters on the stage and that he had had help crafting the speech, but he spoke so eloquently and powerfully that it felt as if he was speaking from his heart. There were several moments when I clapped with the crowd or felt tears swelling in my eyes.

After hearing and seeing Obama I believe that if anything happens, Estonia will fight and not alone. I believe that the world will take action to support Ukraine. (Thankfully French decided to stop delivering Mistrals to Russia.) I believe, or strongly want to believe, that Putin will pull back and calm down.
I know that even when I try to hide hearing about the conflicts of the world I have an extremely important job as a teacher. Most of all because I help my students to grow into caring, open-minded, knowledgeable, principled, and reflective thinkers. They learn to look at things from different perspectives, to communicate in many ways and to solve conflicts peacefully. They will hopefully be willing to take risks to speak up and fight for what is right. I hope that they will grow into the future world leaders who work towards maintaining peace and everyone's right to have education and live with dignity.  

I am so very lucky to live, work and raise my family in peace. 

Today I celebrate PEACE!

A fuzzy picture from the start of the speech. 

If you wish to read or view the speech you can click on the link below:
Barack Obama's speech in Tallinn

Spring