This year I will turn 50 and my youngest daughter will become an adult. My first reaction after realising this was to ask my family to be extra gentle with me for these two events in one year might be too much to handle.
"Aren't we always?" was their response.
True it is. I don't have to ask them to be gentle, I need to be kind and understanding myself. I have to reframe my mindset from this change being something dark and depressing, to seeing it as a step up, changing levels, beginning a new era of my life.
I am looking for ways to nurture myself, to move forward, to grow and thrive, to celebrate. I wish to make sure that this year I will tell a story of a strong beautiful woman who embraces this change, lives a fulfilling and joyful life, expresses herself boldly and creatively, is willing to share wise words and inspiration, and finds multiple reasons to smile, laugh and show gratitude.
One of the first steps I took was to gift myself with a gorgeous photo-interview book about women between 50-80. It includes 24 Estonian women from various areas of life: actresses, entrepreneurs, leaders, educators, artist, doctors, journalists.
They answer questions like: What have you learned about life? What have you learned about yourself? How do you deal with the changes that come with age? How do you take care of yourself? How do you manage challenges? How do you get along with yourself? What does beauty mean to you? What have men and children taught you? What do you dream about? What do you regret? What would you do differently if you could go back? What helps to keep joy and move forward? What has been the most interesting time of your life? What would you tell younger women? And many more. Good questions to ponder as I approach the special milestone in my life.
If any of my readers have some advice to me on how to manage this change, your advice is most welcome.
Ahhh, Terje, what a beautiful year lies ahead for you. This line struck me as important and powerful and lovely: "I will tell a story of a strong beautiful woman who embraces this change, lives a fulfilling and joyful life, expresses herself boldly and creatively, is willing to share wise words and inspiration, and finds multiple reasons to smile, laugh and show gratitude."
ReplyDeleteA few years ago I was praying and praying and praying that I would be a woman of wisdom and whimsy. One day, I realized that I already am. It was time to stop hoping to become something I had already become. It was time to embrace being a woman of wisdom and whimsy.
That is my hope for you, too. That you will take the line about the woman you are and put it somewhere you will see it and believe it and live it. You are already a strong and beautiful woman. Here's to a year of collecting stories that will provide the evidence you need to believe it.
love & hugs,
ruth
What an extraordinary gift to give yourself, that book! Wish I'd thought of that when I turned 50. Truth: it was the first birthday that troubled me. And now it's a good bit behind me...what have I learned?? Gracious, if I answer all those brilliant questions you ask, my reply here might be a mile long. I will try a few: I have learned to trust myself, that my thoughts can be my own. I have learned that I need less sleep than I used to. The men in my life have taught me to take responsibility seriously (by example) and to make time for creativity (by non-example). My children have taught me the extraordinary power of forgiveness. My daydreams are usually about writing and spending time with my family - simple things - and my dreams at night are colorful, vivid, and full of curious symbolism. I have dreams (desires) of traveling. I have a greater sense of peace in my life now than I ever have. My granddaughters are my greatest joy. They are never out of my thoughts. I wish you breathtaking moments as you reach your milestone, Terje - wonders await, I promise!
ReplyDeleteDear Terje, you are a strong beautiful woman who embraces all life offers. Perhaps the year of fifty seems like a turning point, but it is just another adventure into a new period of life. You will live it fully and enjoy all that it brings.
ReplyDeleteI would love to hear how you answer these questions from your book, because I feel like you would have wise and lovely answers. I hope you can enjoy this wonderful year.
ReplyDeleteTerje, what a wonderful milestone lies ahead. My husband surprised me with a meal at a favorite restaurant surrounded by friends. Only I kind of figured it out when I saw the charge on the credit card bill in advance of the event.
ReplyDeleteOne of the things I've learned along the way is to embrace and love the me that I am today. I wish the same for you!
That fourth paragraph is fabulous, Terje, especially these words " a story of a strong beautiful woman who embraces this change, lives a fulfilling and joyful life, expresses herself boldly and creatively." What a wonderful way to mindfully approach this milestone in your life. Wishing you the best this year! PS I'll be pondering the questions you posed and suspect they'll serve as rich fodder for notebook writing. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteYour post and the comments are so good. The questions you listed from what sounds like an amazing book were very moving.
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